Pumpkin Spice Latte

Have you ever been eating pumpkin pie and drinking coffee and thought to yourself, "I should really put these in a blender and drink whatever comes out"? No? Well Starbucks has. This year is the 7th they're offering customers the Pumpkin Spice Latte. And folks, it's a really terrible drink.

(Don't be fooled by its pleasing appearance.)

The thinking behind the Pumpkin Spice Latte must have been something like, "If it tastes good to eat pumpkin pie and drink coffee, then surely combining the two into one beverage would be equally as good if not better, right?"

No!! That's absolutely incorrect. Coffee and pumpkin pie taste good when they're taken in turn, so that one taste dominates the other. It's the light aftertaste of one overshadowed by a fresh helping of the other that's so delicious. Taken together in large doses, they bring out the worst in each other: the pumpkin tastes flat and rotten, the coffee tastes sharp and overly acidic, and the mid-palate taste is not unlike holding a mouthful of unflavored vegetable shortening. The drink is a failure from start to finish.

And I have one every fall. Why? Because I'm a sucker. I love fall, I love pumpkins, I love lattes... I'm already a coffee drinker, and I already visit Starbucks semi-regularly. It was practically tailor-made for me. So yes, I buy one -- just one -- every autumn. And I drink it. And it's bad. But it's seasonal! How can I resist?

Besides, it's really just a warm up for the true superstar of seasonal beverages that's just around the corner; the one they nailed, the one they hit out of the park. Ladies and gentlemen, it's nearly time for the Peppermint Mocha!